RSS Feed

Another year, another post

Posted on

So for some reason, I only update this thing once every year. This time I am a little under a year at about 10 months. I wish that I wasn’t so busy, or that I didn’t hold on to the excuse of being busy.

Right now I am at work at our campus library pretending to be doing my homework. You’d think after all this time I would be a better student. Alas, I am not. It’s like I am super good at prioritizing and getting motivated in my head, at first. But then the second I sit down to actually do it I either 1) get tired or 2) can’t focus. Or like right now, get called to do meaningless busy work by my boss. Gee thanks. Guess it’s so long again.

A Year Later and Another Summer to Come

Posted on

I apologize for taking almost an entire year to update this blog. Things with school and health problems took up my whole school year once last summer ended. I went the entire summer without having more than the sniffles and I return here to get a UTI which led us to discover I had mono, then the flu which led me to get bronchitis, and recently I’ve been fighting a cold and some weird stomach issues that left me not wanting to eat or drink anything for a week. During all of this my mother was sick for a while at the beginning of the school year and was hospitalized. Then my oldest sister Michelle was hospitalized over spring break for double pneumonia and the swine flu. Thanks to LOTS of prayer everyone is much better now!! But all of these things really paid a toll on myself as well as my family and sitting here writing this I keep asking myself where the year went.

So on to this coming summer, Summer 2011, I have no idea what I am doing. A few months ago Paul and I did reapply to work at Clydehurst in Montana again but we were not certain that was where we would go. I think a lot of why we applied again was because we couldn’t see ourselves not reapplying. It was a really great summer filled with so many memories and great experiences that helped us grow. We were both accepted back at camp but still weren’t for sure that’s what we were supposed to do. Paul had another job for the summer being offered to him and I just wasn’t sure I was supposed to/could go back to Montana. After lots and lots of debating with ourselves, we realized that Clydehurst is not in our plans for this summer. I hated making the phone call to Curtis at camp declining my position they so graciously gave me. But despite the tears that came after that conversation I knew that what I did was right. Paul and I weren’t saying no to never returning to Clydehurst; believe me we will make it back up there one day. We were saying no to a door that we felt God was closing and yes to the path we felt God was calling us to.

I am not perfect, so I have my fears and concerns about this summer. But I am giving it all over to God because I know He will provide for me this summer in ways I never thought would happen. I am excited for the internship opportunity that Paul has been given this summer and I am excited to go home and be with my family for a while. All of the other details of what I am going to do and how Paul and I’s relationship will work are things that I do not have to worry about because God has control of it all. For this, I am thankful.

“Show me your ways, LORD, teach me your paths. Guide me in your truth and teach me, for you are God my Savior, and my hope is in you all day long.” Psalm 25:4-5

Mountains + Hiking = Summer <3

Posted on

This summer Paul and I had the opportunity to work at Clydehurst Christian Rance in McLeod, Montana. For those of you that follow this you will remember that I really struggled with whether or not this was where God wanted me for the summer. I can tell you wholeheartedly that this was exactly where I was supposed to be🙂

There’s so much that I could talk about involving this summer. So many stories and memories. But instead I will tell you about what I learned and if you’d like to hear some stories then you can ask me sometime🙂

I believe that the biggest thing I learned this summer is that God is always there with me when I need him. Ask anyone that knows me and they will tell you that everything about this camp was not me. Hiking, being outdoors, playing sports and other athletic activities, horses, riflery, oh and did I mention hiking? No one really understood why I was going, heck I didn’t even know! I just knew that if I got accepted, and got on that bus, and made it to Montana…that’s where I was meant to be. So the first week of camp was really hard. I had to try a lot of new things and meet a lot of new people. At first I was discouraged and overwhelmed and just wanted to go home. Eventually I accepted that God had me there not to torture me, but to help me grow in who I am. God helped me every time I had to climb those mountains or jump on a horse and eventually, I really grew to love it. My job at this camp was to lead a group of girls every week during youth camps and then serve families during family camps. There were a few times when I honestly felt like I wasn’t doing anything right and that there was no way I could help these kids and these families. But God was there to place the new people in my life right there when I needed them to support me and pray for me.

As you can guess, by the end of camp I didn’t want to go home. Montana became a part of me, as did Clydehurst Christian Ranch. I now love horses and tolerate hiking. I have made great friends from there and still have contact with some of my girls I counseled. I don’t know what God has in store for me next summer, but I do know that I will return to there one day and hopefully for many days after that.

I’m mister lonely

Posted on

So my sister and her family left for Chicago this morning and I am staying at their house while they are gone (they will be back Sunday). And I have to admit. Being in a house all by myself is not very exciting. Who wants to watch CSI or Future Foods or Clean House by themselves? That’s right. No one. Thankfully I am finding ways to keep myself busy by making plans with some friends for the next couple of days. I also thought about working out for a bit tonight however sitting on the couch like a bum seemed like a better plan tonight because working out isn’t fun by yourself either (to me that is). I never really considered myself a flaming extrovert but when there are times like these when I am by myself I realize how much I really do need to be around people. Maybe God is trying to teach me something through this though? Or maybe I am just lame lol. Thankfully I have the internet, unlimited texting, cable tv, and a number of good books to read to keep me busy when I am not hanging out with people. Although the majority of thus books are scary ones…so I should probably stay away from those so I do not freak myself out. Which I do very well at.

Ok well I could bore you to death with random thoughts of mine but I won’t put you through that. I am off to do….something. I don’t know what.. haha. Wish me luck!

Happy Birthday Paul!

Posted on

Today is my boyfriend Paul’s 20th birthday. So for his birthday I decided to make a list of 20 things that I love about him. So here we go…

  1. I love his passion and fire for God. We met on a summer missions trip so literally since day one of knowing him I have seen his heart for God.
  2. I love his knowledge of God. Paul’s dad is a pastor and while growing up he participated in something called Bible Quizzing. Basically if I ever have any questions about the Bible and God’s teachings then I ask him.
  3. I love his love of ministry. Paul wants to be a youth pastor. He loves working with youth and he is good at it.
  4. I love that he has his priorities straight. He always makes sure that he is doing first and foremost what it is God wants him to be doing despite other things in life.
  5. I love his hard work and dedication. Paul is a great student with great self determination. If something needs to be done he gets a head start on it and works diligently to get it done.
  6. I love his acceptance of responsibility. On top of classes for school, he was a growth group leader this year, he worked a campus job, and next year he’ll be an RA on his hall. He is a great leader that loves to lead.
  7. I love that he comes from a big family. Coming from a big family he knows how important family is and that spending time with family is important.
  8. I love that he is outgoing. He loves meeting new people and being friends with everyone.
  9. I love that he is active and sporty. Sports are his way of fellowship. If he could be outside or in a gym 24/7 he would be. Sports relieve stress and bring him lots of fun.
  10. I love his sense of humor. He knows exactly how to make me laugh. And his laugh is adorable.
  11. I love his worry-free attitude. Paul never worries whereas worrying is something i really struggle with and he is very good at always reminding me not to worry because everything will be okay.
  12. I love his love of kids. As mentioned earlier, since I’ve known Paul he has been working with kids and he loves it. This past semester he worked at our local church’s youth group. He is a youth ministry major and wants to be a youth pastor. He will make a great pastor as well as a great father. Seeing him interact with my nephews and niece only strengthens my belief and confidence of this.
  13. I love his laid back attitude. Paul is a very “go with the flow” kind of guy. Making set plans one by one isn’t how he likes to do things. Even though I am the opposite it only helps me.
  14. I love how different than I he is. Even though our many many differences cause us lots of problems it has been very beneficial for us as well. He balances me out and I balance him out. We fit :]
  15. I love his sarcasm (usually). I tend to deny this fact, but it’s more fun that way. As long as his sarcasm is light and fun, it’s great.
  16. I love his taste in music. Paul likes anything from straight up rap to southern country. It always makes me laugh being in a car with him with the radio on.
  17. I love that he’s a country boy. He’ll open doors for me, pull out chairs for me, and give me his jacket when I’m cold. He takes care of me.
  18. I love that he is always warm. I am always cold so it’s a perfect combination.
  19. I love he steps up in our relationship. Paul understands that it’s the man’s responsibility to be the leader in the relationship and he does a great job at it. He leads me in every aspect of my life and our lives together. I trust him.
  20. I love everything about Paul Joseph Jones with my whole heart forever and always ♥ He is the love of my life and I want to be with him only forever :]

Happy Birthday Baby!! ♥


Not right now Derrick!!

Posted on

I know, I know. I never update this thing. However, I have been sick the past week and before that I was busy with finals and the whole moving back home for the summer process. So, give me a break, I’m here now.

If you’ve been reading you’ll remember that in my last post I had said that I was giving up Facebook for a bit. Well that didn’t last too long. It’s the summer and Facebook is the easiest way to stay connected to my friends back at school that I will not see for 3 months. Don’t worry I do not get on it for hours at a time anymore. More I sign in, check to see if I have any notifications, maybe creep for a few minutes, then I’m off of there (unless someone starts chatting with me).

Ok so on to other aspects of life like Summer 2010. As you already know, and for those of you reading for the first time,  my boyfriend Paul and I are going to work at a christian ranch in Montana this summer. Paul worked there last summer and loved it so he got me interested as well. The camp starts on June 6th (4ish weeks from now) and Paul and I do not have a way there yet. Did you know that plane tickets are super pricey right now?? We did not. The cheapest we could find was around $1000 for both and I round trip. So we had to come up with a plan B. Neither of us own a car so driving there was out of the question. Then my sister Brittany suggested that we look into taking a Greyhound Bus there. I was not too keen on this idea at all but we looked and yep…it’s much much cheaper. For the two of us to go together it would be around $350 round trip to Montana oh and a glorious 1 day and 12 hour trip. *UGH* I know that this is well, our only option so this is what we’re going to do. However. We have a problem. Paul is leaving for vacation on Monday with his family and we need to buy the tickets by Wednesday to get this 21 day discount they have. Now I know what you are thinking, it’s only Saturday so there’s always tomorrow to get the money together and buy them. False. He is busy tomorrow. So at this very moment we are texting and trying to figure it all out.  It will all work out…I know it, but I hate that it’s cutting it so close. THIS JUST IN… Paul is going to pay for the tickets and then I’m going to just pay him back at some point I guess (this was his plan).

Lastly I’d like to explain my title for this post. It’s from one of the BalloonShop videos on youtube. If you have never seen their videos…you’re life in incomplete till you do so. Just hit up youtube and search BalloonShop. Here’s a little taste of their awesomeness.

P.S. My brother-in-law (the one who’s birthday is tomorrow) is a jerk… :]

Facebook no longer

Posted on

In case you haven’t heard, I am taking a break from the facebook world. My focus lately has not been on God like it should always be rather it’s been on worldly relationships and drama. This does mean though that I will be using this more effectively to keep you up to date on my life. I will try to add pictures when I can as well. This break from facebook will not be permanent because when I go to Montana this summer it will be one of my only connections to the outside world. So for now I hope you enjoy this just the same if not better. You can leave comments if you would like to talk to me or you can email me at ferkoan@grace.edu I will also still be on skype :]

Until next time…

Ash